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Living Well Through Therapy

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Is Failure Really The End Of The World?

Failure, or fear of failure, can drive us to extreme lengths.

As the San Diego therapists put it very well, humans are born with an innate drive to be successful, regardless of whether it is in their careers, family, social life or other dimensions and areas. The problem here is that today’s driven society only accepts success and totally discards the lengthy or difficult part of achieving it. According to Erik Erikson, the creator of the theory of social development, individuals are prone to undergo several stages in their lives, which are focused on achieving success in a certain aspect of life. However, in order to be able to achieve the successful stage, the individual must first experience failure.

About expectations and hopes and their relationship with failure

It often happens that individuals who fail at achieving something are immediately punished, be it by their children, spouses, employers, colleagues, parents, etc. While it is true that a person cannot be 100% confident all the time, and a little bit of fear can be a motivational stimulus, it can also become an obsession or even a phobia that will prevent that person from trying in the future.

Based on this fact, several researchers have wondered whether the paralyzing fear of failure can be linked to a high desire to achieve success. Even though there have been several studies on this topic, the results attained are mixed and cannot provide a clear answer. Therefore, some studies indicated that individuals who want to be successful badly are actually scared of failing. Other studies suggest the opposition fear-success has nothing to do with the goals and expectation a person has, but rather that the individual prefers a conservative approach to things. In other words, even though they would like to be successful, they will not risk taking any chances and hence, will not make risky decision in order not to fail.

Can the fear of failure be treated?

There are several methods a therapist can use in order to treat the fear of failure. These include, NLP, hypnotherapy, energy psychology, etc. And, the good news is that patients undergoing these treatment options usually respond positively to the therapies and are prepared to reach their full potential. The hypnotherapist’s role is to re-program the subconscious and minimize the impact of fear of failure, while the NLP practices can help an individual create his own perspective. The energy psychology is a rather new therapy mostly used in treating phobias. Even though some therapists compare this therapeutic approach to acupuncture, individuals reluctant to holistic methods should rest assured that it is very effective.

The most common treatment options for the fear of failure are the cognitive-behavioral therapies since they help the person discover new ways of thinking about his available options. The psychoanalytic approaches are used less frequently and are most effective in circumstances when there are underlying conflicts involved. In general, San Diego therapists adapt the techniques to the client and if the individual feels he has no control over his life, then he will start doing exercises that teach him how to make decisions independently.

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Do Introverts Need To Be Cured?

Therapy can be helpful for social awkwardness.

As any therapist in Encinitas will tell you, the fact that a person is an introvert does not automatically make him shy, anti social, a loner or a person who lacks social skills. Being an introvert actually means that the person feels more comfortable and energized when he is in the company of few people and hence, finds the company of large groups exhausting and draining.

In addition, individuals who are characterized as introverts usually prefer exploring the inner world of the mind, rather than interacting with others, despite the fact that most of them have normal social skills. Consequentially, according to statistics, approximately 60% of the gifted population is introverted, whereas the percentage of introverts in the general population is only half.

Being introverted versus being shy

Shyness is not a personality trait and hence, it can be treated. Being shy is often described as having feelings of extreme awkwardness, being very uncomfortable in certain social contexts and feeling apprehension. Whether or not a person is shy has nothing to do with how communicative that individual is, as even chatterboxes can be timid. In addition, most shy people are feeling lonely since their reactions and feelings prevent them from interacting or talking to others. On the other hand, introverts prefer to be alone and have very few moments when they can truly say they feel lonely.

The major distinctions between shyness and being introverted comes from the fact that while the introverts prefer to be alone, the shy individuals actually want to interact with others but are restrained to do so by their fear. This does not mean that the introvert will not participate in social events or gatherings, but rather that they prefer doing things their way. Since they are a bit more sensitive to details, the introverts can get bored quite easily with small talk, noisy kids or the arrogance and ignorance shown by others present. This is why they prefer a small, but sincere group of friends.

Depression versus introversion

Several studies have indicated that introverts are more prone to becoming depressed than extroverts. This guide believes that the reasons introversion and depression are one and the same thing for most, is due to the mechanism of the latter. In a nutshell, depression modifies a person’s behavior, as they want to avoid other people as much as possible, preferring to stay alone, are almost always tired, have sleep disorders and experience extreme states of sadness. In short, even though introverts can manifest some of the aforementioned behaviors, they are completely different from depressed individuals.

Introverts do not need to be cured

Not everyone who is shy needs therapeutic treatment.

Just because a person feels overwhelmed by large, noisy groups that does not mean there is something wrong with them. Introversion is quite a delicate topic for parents who notice their child spends very little time with other kids and prefers being alone. Therefore, the parents of introverted children worry unnecessarily. However, if they have strong reasons to believe that there is more to it than the fact the child is introverted, they can always speak to a therapist in Encinitas and find out.

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COMBINE – An Effective Treatment for Alcoholism?

Alcoholism treatment through therapy.

Most people seeking help on dealing with alcohol abuse typically expect a San Diego therapist to recommend them to enroll in the classic twelve-steps program provided by Alcoholics Anonymous. However, we would like to point out that studies carried out between 2010 and 2011 have shown that the most efficient treatment method for alcoholism is a combination of behavioral therapy and medication. The paper, also known as the COMBINE study, was carried out on a representative sample of 1383 declared alcoholics and the conclusions were drawn after 20 counseling sessions. In addition to the counseling sessions with the behavioral specialist, the participants were taking prescribed drugs, namely naltrexone.

A short list of COMBINE’s findings

One of the most important discoveries of the researchers during the study was that the participants had considerably reduced the consumption of alcohol during treatment. As the study indicates, approximately 75% of the participants had reduced the consumption of alcoholic beverages from 66 to 13 per week. According to the researchers, these amazing results were possible due to naltrexone, a drug that reduced the overall craving for alcohol.

Another interesting finding of the study is that medical management combined with either naltrexone or specialized alcohol counseling doubled the complete recovery chances of the patients. As a side note, the concept of medical management refers to nine brief structured outpatient interventions provided by a medical professional. Compared to the regular alcohol dependence interventions, the medical management is more intense and some medical professionals even relate it to the importance of insulin therapy for diabetes patients.

When the patients were tested one year later, it was shown that the return to heavy drinking for the participants had dropped drastically. In short, more than half of the participants were abstinent and the best outcomes in patients were observed on those who received naltrexone or specialized alcohol counseling and medical management.

What do the results mean to alcoholics and therapists?

The findings of the study are of great importance to both behavioral therapists and primary care physicians involved in alcohol addiction treatment.

As the study showed, now therapists and doctors have a viable method of addressing this dependency without the use of drugs. At the same time, specialized alcohol counseling can be suggested as a treatment method for patients who refuse any kind of pharmaceutical treatments. Even though naltrexone can help reduce the cravings, essentially it only provides a small advantage, mostly to the patients who did not receive any counseling.

The idea of brief interventions and various therapies borrowed from other fields is relatively new. However, the intensive clinical research undertake in the past 15 years seems to indicate that the outcomes in alcoholic patients are more prolific and reduce the risks associated with heavy alcohol consumption. For the patient, this means he has several choices of addressing his problem and a higher chance of recovery. For the medical world, this opens up a new perspective regarding specialties and the importance of various professionals, such as a San Diego therapist, physician, counselor and others to collaborate.

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Whom To Turn To If Your Child Has Autism?

Seeking the help of a therapist is a good idea for autistic children.

Once a child has been diagnosed with autism then the next step you should consider is to seek help from a therapist in Encinitas. Most parents in this situation start blaming themselves and get depressed instead of focusing on the child’s immediate needs for intervention.

We feel that it's important to inform you that the actual cause of autism is still a controversial topic within the medical community, none of which is related to bad parenting. So far, the causes of autism are associated with the MMR vaccine, the mercury-based preservative found in certain vaccines, the physiology of the brain, deficits in the immune system, genetic disorders, poor nutrition and food allergies.

Is an occupational therapist qualified to help children with autism?

The primary focus of occupational therapy is to aid individuals achieve personal independence in all facets of their lives. In the case of autism, the occupational therapist can teach a child the basic skills needed to live a normal life. In the past, the role of this professional was to help kids with autism develop basic abilities for handwriting, shoe tying, shirt buttoning, personal hygiene, etc. However, nowadays there are therapists that specialize in helping children with autism and work with them on other important skills, such as social and playing abilities.

What does the occupational therapist effectively do for an autism patient?

First of all, specialized therapists know the basic techniques of sensory integration, meaning that they are able to detect and work with the possible issues that prevent the proper processing of information through the senses. Consequentially, this expert will know how to address the child and teach him how to respond accordingly to the information received through hearing, sight, touch and so on. The typical interventions used for enhancing the way the child receives the information include: playing in a ball pit, swinging, brushing and other activities that can aid him manage his body in space.

Therapist help for autistic children.

Since children with autism lack the basic social skills in the vast majority of cases, the role of the occupational therapist is to smoothen the play activities and help the child interact and communicate with other playmates. This technique is also known as a structured play therapy and its aim is to help the child cultivate emotional, intellectual and physical skills. The most common intervention used to teach the basic social skills is known as Floortime.

Perhaps one of the most important tasks an occupation therapist will have to do is to assist the child to grow adaptive techniques and strategies. What this means is that if the therapist does not notice any improvement in teaching the child handwriting, then he will try to teach him an alternative writing method, such as keyboarding.

At the same time, the therapist facilitates the individual transition from one person to another or through various settings via standard devised techniques. The assistance an occupational therapist in Encinitas can offer usually involves soothing strategies and can really come in handy for the transition period from school or kindergarten to home.

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What Can Be Done When A Child Resists Therapy?

What do to when a child resists therapy?

More often than not, San Diego therapists are confronted with resistance to therapy, especially when they are dealing with children and young teens. However, the good news is that there are several measures parents can take in order to ensure that their child will benefit from the therapy. The best approaches on this matter however, will need to be discussed with your child’s therapist.

What causes a child to be resistant or to refuse therapy?

One of the reasons why a child will refuse to talk to a therapist is the fact that he or she perceives the therapist as a stranger and hence, feels uncomfortable to present their feelings and thoughts. The uncomfortable feeling  can be derived from the fact that the child is afraid that the therapist might pass judgment or punish him if he were to tell him how he really feels about his friends, family, school or his current thoughts about life in general. At the same time, the child might not feel that the therapist session is strictly confidential and others will know about his ‘silly’ problems.

What can parents do when confronted with this situation?

When a child refuses or does not respond to a single treatment although he needs it, parents can consider a combination of treatments. For instance, for depressed children and teens, a combination of cognitive-behavioral therapy with some mild medication can prove effective. In addition, for children that are only in therapy, it is advisable to discuss the other available approaches that can be used during a session to draw his attention and make him feel safe. If the child refuses to open up or presents resistance to therapy due to shyness, then the best method here is the “lead by example” approach. For instance, you can start out with a few family sessions to create a friendly and safe environment.

When a child resists therapy...

Sometimes, it can happen that a child does not respond well to therapy because he feels uncomfortable with his current therapist. It is important to note that not all therapists use the same approaches, so scheduling a meeting with him beforehand can prove helpful to do a pre-screen.  Studies have shown that usually children feel more at ease with therapists of the same gender, especially when they have to discuss delicate and intimate matters. Whenever parents are unsure about the preferences of their child the best thing they can do is ask them.

Can the therapist help the child respond better to the treatment?

The short answer to this question is yes, as all professionals in the medical field are well aware of the common fears among children regarding doctors. In general, the visit to the doctor is accompanied by feelings of fear and unknown, mainly because children have a very vivid imagination and they envision the worse. At the same time, let’s not forget the negative portrays the Hollywood blockbusters have managed to create for psychiatrists and therapists alike. However, for best results and positive responses from the child, it is best to get him or her involved in finding the San Diego therapists that he/she feels comfortable around.

What are your experiences? Please let me know by leaving me a comment :-)

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Mind-Being Synergy—Cognitive Therapy and Mindfulness

Cognitive behavioral therapy is instrumental in developing awareness.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, or CBT as it is commonly known, is currently the most widely utilized modality in psychotherapy.  A large body of research has confirmed the effectiveness of CBT in treating anxiety and mood disorders.  CBT is based in the understanding that thinking, feeling and actions are mutually inter-influencing aspects of human experience that in turn greatly influence an individual’s mood and anxiety level. CBT’s most powerful insight is that thinking can be chosen and shaped through a conscious, volitional process. The tools that CBT offers enable people to choose thoughts and actions in specific ways and thereby improve mood state and anxiety.  This conscious process brings one to the doorstep of Mindfulness.

CBT works on becoming aware of one’s thinking and then changing your thinking where desired. Mindfulness starts with this awareness of thought in order to transcend thinking and experience life in full consciousness.

Stated in simple terms, CBT works with thought and Mindfulness works through experience. Mindfulness is an experiential process of self-awareness.  In self-awareness we experience life fully and without anxiety.  When living self-aware we experience the fullness of who we are and experience life in a way that we have yearned for but somehow had found unattainable.  When we transcend thinking we discover our true nature is to be at peace and that living through our true self brings us joy.

Mindfulness allows us to live with internal clarity; knowing who we are and what our purpose is. Developing mindfulness is an ongoing process, much like physical exercise. It takes constant training, persistence, and dedication. But the rewards that mindfulness provides makes the endeavor very much worth the labor and effort spent in its procurement.

Please share your thoughts by leaving a comment below.

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Do You Know The Therapeutic Effects Of Music On The Body And Mind?

Music therapy can soothe the body and mind.

Music Therapy is an integral component of San Diego Therapy.

Combating the negative effects of stress can nowadays be achieved in a fun way with the aid of music-based San Diego therapy. According to several studies carried out in the past decades, music has the role of allowing a person to open up emotionally and hence, let loose the feelings bundled up inside that are responsible for illnesses. Overall, the promoters of music therapy believe that tunes inspire people to examine themselves, their lives and their relationships with the people around them.

The consequences of music on the body

It has been shown that patients that are about to undergo surgery typically require less anesthesia, have less adverse reactions to the analgesics and heal more rapidly when music is played before, during and after the medical intervention. In addition, people that are recovering from serious conditions, such as strokes and heart attacks tend to respond more quickly to the medical treatment if soothing music is played in their rooms.

One explanation for these miraculously fast recoveries is that the music vibes stimulate the brainwaves to sync with the beat. While faster and stronger beats can sharpen focus and concentration and promote alert thinking, slower and more meditative rhythms promote a calming and relaxing state. It is worth mentioning that music also stimulates the brain to shift speed easier and led several scientists to believe that the effects of music can be felt long after the patient has stopped listening to it.

San Diego therapy includes innovative music techniques.

Given the way the brainwaves are affected by music vibes, it is only natural that the alterations are felt throughout the other bodily functions, mainly the breathing and heart rate. In a nutshell, as slower and meditative music can plunge a patient in a calming state, the rest of the body activates a relaxation response. Consequentially, it is no wonder that San Diego therapy utilizing music has gathered successful results in lowering blood pressure, ease muscle tension, boost immunity, etc.

Music and your state of mind

Since music promotes physical relaxation, that implies people under a lot of stress can eliminate some tension they bundled inside. In addition, soothing songs can help people get into a meditative state, thus providing an effective alternative for those that find the meditation technique too advanced. The fact of the matter is that by listening to music, and especially positive upbeat tunes, can help a person leave his worries behind and take their problems off their mind. This effect is also given by the fact that music usually includes affirmative lyrics. Therefore, from this point of view, music can be held responsible for promoting a positive focus and attitude.

Music can be used as a sole therapy, but also in combination with other meditation and relaxation techniques, when it can help stressed individuals get into the zone. Music therapy goes very well with practices such as yoga, guided imagery, self hypnoses as well as other DIY stress relief techniques like taking a warm bath or exercising. All in all, music-based San Diego therapy can help people under a lot of stress surround themselves with positive energy.

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Don't Let Fear Take Over Your Life!

Even though it is in human nature to fear certain objects, animals or situations, sometimes; when the fright turns to horror and it takes over your life, it is best to consult with a San Diego therapist. The extreme and unreasonable fear of heights, snakes, needles, insects, germs and so on that is associated with physiological symptoms is known in the medical community as a phobia. It is important to note that people with phobias are so scared of the circumstance, animal or item that they start experiencing anxiety, restlessness and the physical reactions just by thinking of the object of their fear.

Overcome fear with a San Diego therapist.

The difference between phobias and normal fright

Fear is a normal adaptive human response in life threatening situations that determines the body and mind to become alert and hence, be able to respond quickly to protect the person from danger. The difference between a normal concern and a phobia is that the phobic perceives the threat even when it is not there or with an exacerbated level of danger. For instance, knowing that certain breeds of dogs, like the Rottweiler or Pit bull are usually dangerous, a normal person will simply get nervous at the sight of these specific dogs and avoid them. On the other hand, a phobic will refuse to go to the park or any other location where there is a minor possibility to see any dog.

The physical and psychological signs of phobia

The symptomatic picture of a phobic can present emotional and physical reactions varying from mild discomfort to a full blown panic attack. The symptoms experienced can aggravate severely if that person realizes that there are little chances of escaping the object of the fright. In addition, the closer a phobic is to the threatening object, the greater the amplification of the symptoms.

The physical reactions to a typical stressful situation for a phobic include excessive sweating, dizziness, lightheaded sensations, uncontrollable trembling or shaking, a pounding heart, tingling sensations, stomach churning, chest pains and difficulty breathing. The psychological signs associated with a phobia are loss of mental control, an unbearable sensation that he needs to get away, high levels of anxiety, panic, feeling powerless although realizing the overreaction and detachment from oneself.

When to seek help and treatment for phobias

The first sign that it is best to talk to a therapist is when the person acknowledges that he is dramatizing when posed face to face with the object of his fear. Another sign that it is time to see a specialist is when the person starts avoiding places and situations and the fright is so intense and disabling that the avoidance creates disturbances in the normal routine.

Given that a phobic cannot get rid of the anxiety and horror on his own, the best approach is to talk to a therapist. The methods employed by therapists are very effective and some patients have even reported a full recovery in one to four sessions. The top three phobia treatments used by a San Diego therapist and that have shown quick and overall positive results include: facing the fear one step at a time, learning relaxation techniques and challenging negative thoughts.

What are your thoughts? Please let me know by leaving a comment below.

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Therapists can Help through Pre-Marital Sessions

Although the marriage rate is in decline, there are still many couples tying the knot and they are doing this wisely with the help of therapists in San Diego. Pre-marital sessions are becoming more popular by the day and these are helping highlight issues in a couple’s relationship. This means they are able to face and deal with them before they make an impact on the relationship many years down the line.

Use pre-marital therapists in San Diego to cement your relationship.

Counseling can play a major role in helping a person identify their strengths and weaknesses. When you have two people coming together, as with marriage, then they each have their own set of difficulties and ways of dealing with things. Although many couples choose to live together before marrying, there are still a good percentage of people that don’t. This means that if they have never lived with each other prior to the wedding ceremony, then they may not truly know the full extent of the other person’s emotional intelligence.

Engaging in pre-marital counseling sessions allows the couple to air any differences they may already have in a safe environment. Speaking to each other with the help of therapists in San Diego enables a couple to be honest and candid and that can greatly empower and strengthen a relationship. In addition, it will give an insight into the other person’s psyche and, hopefully, raise issues that can be nipped in the bud.

One of the key reasons for divorce or separation is non-communication. If couples were able to communicate with each other in a more effective way, rather than point the finger and blame the other when things go wrong, then more relationships would survive. This is the primary aim of therapists in San Diego.

Cementing relationships in an honest way is so much easier and better for the couple than picking up the pieces after verbal damage has been done. It is easier to alleviate a problem before it becomes a deep-seated issue. Lack of communication is usually the only thing that adds to this damage and there can be many reasons why a couple does not talk. One of them may feel a failure, or may feel they are never listened to. This could be a complete misunderstanding and can be the result on one conversation years ago.

There can’t be a therapist alive that has not encountered a couple with a problem that has been ongoing for years. In many of these cases, the original cause of the argument or issue may have been entirely forgotten as the resentment has been allowed to build over the years.

One of the best medicines is to talk to each other without interruption, blame or finger pointing. If a certain behavior hurts or upsets one of the people in the relationship then talk about it honestly and openly and try to understand why it has such a devastating effect on the other person. If you are the one with the behavior, try to see how it would affect someone on the receiving end. These are two small things that can help a relationship without the intervention of therapists in San Diego.

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What Makes A Good Therapist?

What makes up a good San Diego therapist?

In America, and indeed the world over, many people turn to therapy for a variety of different reasons but have you ever wondered what makes a good San Diego therapist? Seeking the help and advice of a therapist for the first time can be a little daunting, particularly if you have never experienced any kind of support in your life.

However, there is nothing to be nervous about and such a lot to be gained from taking the first step. In fact, any therapist worth their salt will have consulted a therapist themselves at some point in their lives. Even if they haven’t, you can bet that they have seen first-hand experience of the good it has achieved in someone’s life.

First of all, let’s dispel a few myths about therapy. The first thing to consider is that a San Diego therapist is not all-knowing. You may be forgiven for mistaking that your therapist knows everything there is to know and can wave a magic wand to help. Unfortunately it just doesn’t work that way, if it did there would be a lot fewer people with issues. In fact, your San Diego therapist is likely to have gone through some issues or traumas themselves, just like anyone else.

Therapy is not about being a cure-all; it is about giving someone the tools and support to improve their lives. Some issues are very deep-rooted and it can take a long time to get to a point where the real root is exposed. This is especially true if the problem has been compounded over the years. Your therapist is a regular person and talking to them will enable you to relieve some of the burden you have been carrying.

This may be tough on you if you do not divulge your feelings and emotions easily, but it can be so helpful to talk and release something that has been hidden away for so many years. This in itself can cause you to heave a deep sigh of relief and you will very quickly recognize the amount of pressure your issue has exerted on you, without you even being aware of it doing so.

There are many different kinds of therapy available and some systems of help and guidance work better for some people and not as well for others. This is because we are all different and we all process and deal with information differently. This is how one person can have issues with a certain course of action, when another person who has been involved in the same situation, shows no apparent signs of disturbance at all.

It does not mean that you are weaker than anyone else; it just means that you do not have the necessary skills and emotional recognition to heal alone. That is why it is so wonderful to know that a San Diego therapist is just a phone call away and is ready and waiting to help relieve you of anxiety, trauma, emotional adjustment to life’s situations, or just give that support that is missing in your life.

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